Thursday, June 26, 2008

My Memories

While on vacation last week I learned that my father passed away, unexpectedly.

My parents separated when I was only 2 years old. When I was 5 years old my mom remarried a wonderful man and we moved to the other end of the country. However, my mother made sure that I visited my father every year. I would spend weeks in New England with my dad, step-mother and brother. While it was not the perfect father/daughter relationship, it was what it was and I’m grateful for the time I was able to spend with him.

I remember playing Yahtzee until late at night…playing just one more game so that we could beat the other in the next game. I remember him and I sitting on the porch swing, on his deck, telling him how my life was going to turn out….graduate high school by this date, graduate college by this date, marry by this age and have kids so many years later. He listened and agreed it sounded like a good plan, never indicating I was na├»ve to think all things work out as we plan. I remember not feeling well at my Aunt Holly’s wedding, so he and Glenda took me back to my grandparent’s house and he played cards with me. When I graduated high school he was there and was able to see my home and where I grew up. I remember the fresh Maine ‘lobstas’ he would bring home during my summer visits and that he always kissed me goodnight before heading off to bed each night.

He had a great laugh and a wonderful smile, dimple and all. Everyone always says I look like my mom, especially when we are standing side by side, but my mom has always thought that I look like my dad. Whenever I visited him, I would look for features of my own that matched his. I decided I have his eyes, his lips, his nose and toes. I wear them all proudly. He also was a talented artist. He could draw and paint and take beautiful photographs. I like to think that I inherited those qualities, too.


I am reminded that my heavenly Father chose Lawrence E. Faulkner as my earthly father. And while it would be very easy to focus on what I missed out on, to focus on the negative, I choose to remember the good, the fun, the laughter and the smiles we shared together. If for no other reason, my father taught me that the decisions and choices we make in our lives affect not only us, but those around us. I am reminded of this now more in his passing than I ever was while he was alive.


We went to hear a friend’s band one summer in Gloucester and they played this song. We danced by the light of the tungsten lights…oh well, close enough. This one’s for you, dad. I love you and will miss you.

7 comments:

Josh said...

What a beautiful celebration of your father. I'm glad you shared it with us. Thanks.

gideonmommasita said...

So many cards say "there's healing in the memories"...awfully sorry, it still isn't easy though.

Dee Dee's Diary said...

I thought I was all finished crying...but your words and the song did me in. Thanks, Robin. Once again...your perspective has moved me. I am so proud to be your mom. I am so proud of the woman you have become, through the experiences that God has allowed in your life...some of your choosing...some by the choices others have made - as you have said - all that said...I am most thankful to have you as a daughter and a friend.

Dee Dee's Diary said...

Oh and...you DEFINITELY have his infectious laugh.

Johnna said...

I am so sorry to hear about your Dad. You know I know exactly how you feel. It is hard thing to lose a parent and I thank you for sharing your memories. It made me think of my own Dad and our times together and what I inherited from him.

Melissa said...

Okay, I'm still crying. Even though I didn't know your dad very well, except the 2 weeks I spent in Rock"pot" (Bostonian accent intended), but he's connected to you and that is where the emotion comes in. I believe God gave us such an awesome connection, partially, because of our dads. I will miss him. Didn't even think about the song when we were watching the movie the other day...Was that the time we went and saw Harvey and Angela? I think that was the night my ear started hurting. Lots of memories....

Anonymous said...

HEY ROBIN-WE'RE VERY SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR DAD----HE WAS A SWEET GUY-----PEACE-THE SCHUMACHER 3


2008 is going to be great....
It's the year I'm going to lose weight!